Kid Funnies (and a not so Funny)

We'll go for the not so funny first:
Mattie gave us a good opportunity to be thankful for God's protection on Wednesday.  I heard a big pop, buzz, and a breaker trip while we were heading out the door to go to piano lessons.  Went up to see what had happened and saw two of her "play" (but very real) house keys in the electrical outlet by her bed.  When she saw me she was quiet, but quickly fell apart with big tears wailing, "I'm so sorry, Mommy!!  I'm so sorry!"


The more I looked I noticed she actually melted 1/4" off one of the keys! There was black all over her hand and the keys and rings had burn spots on them in 4 or 5 places... not to mention the black all over the outlet and the wall surrounding it.  The praise??  She actually (for once!) had shoes with rubber soles on that kept her safe.  I'm not much of a worrier, but it's not fun to think about how badly she could have been hurt.  The keys had rings on them, so they touched each other forming a complete circuit. 


I actually wasn't convinced enough that she would remember it. (Mattie is my repeat offender child for sure!) But when she saw the two feet of sparks when Robert tried to turn the breaker back on, I think that sealed the deal for her.  I sure hope it did anyway!

*****

Now for the funnies:
Robert gave Jacob a kiss one night while tucking him in.  Jacob said, "Quit, Dad!  Stop acting gay."

The next night ~ 
Jacob:  Now don't you start acting gay again.... Dad, what is gay anyway?
Robert:  Well you know.  You said it.
Jacob:  I know, but I just can't understand it.  
Robert:  I know.  Some people think it's okay.  They don't think it's sin or that God doesn't want us to act that way.
Jacob:  Don't they know that it will never work?
Robert (nervously):  What do you mean?
Jacob:  Well, if two men get married, there's not going to be anyone there to do the housework, like cooking and cleaning.  That'll never work.  Don't they get that?  Now if two women got married, it would be okay because they know how to do that stuff.

Clearly it's time for Robert to start doing some cooking and cleaning around here!!!

*****

The kids were going round and round with tongue twisters for several days at breakfast and lunch time.  One day, after many (very) unsuccessful attempts at Peter Piper picking a peck of pickled peppers... I heard Mattie say, "Here.  Let's do this one!  If Peter Piper picked a tomato..."